Well, any movie with the words “Starring Jackie Chan and Bruce Li” automatically makes me scoff. My friends called it “historical”. That it might be. I don’t really know. But I greatly enjoyed it. Spoilers from here on out. BEWARE.
The movie starts with the acknowledgment of the same 20 companies and people. It was ridiculous. But the effects and scenery were stunning. Then you have what looks like a blond Jet Li. I could hardly contain my laughter. He has a golden staff and fights of soldiers in jade. Turns out, that was all a dream in the head of some weird guy in the middle of the New York ghetto. He’s a loser who spends all day watching kung fu movies. He’s friends with a bootleg movie store owner who is really old and looks like Jackie Chan. Oh wait. It is Jackie Chan. Fooled my boyfriend though. The kid finds the golden staff in his dream in the back of the shop. Any ways, some dumb stuff happens and the kid gets beat up and forced to help some ‘gangstas’ break into the old man’s shop to rob it. It ends badly, as the old store keeper is shot. The gangstas chase the kid , who picked up the staff and they end up on the roof and the kid falls. He wakes up in Imperial China. Now I half gagged as I thought “Oh great. It’s “A Kid in King Arthur’s Court.” But as bad as it sounds, it actually progressed very well. Jackie Chan appears yet again , as a drunken kung fu master. He saves the kid’s butt and tells him the story of the staff and the Monkey King. As expected, the drunken master takes him somewhere to eat, and drink. Then there’s a classic bar brawl. A mysterious girl named Sparrow who throws dart things and plays instrument follows them. She has a pretty sad story. The guy who basically rules China had her parents killed and only she survived. Then they meet Jet Li, who is a monk. Together, they are a big happy family out for vengeance and fighting for the forces of good. All while training the dopey white guy. Meanwhile, the “White Witch” is summoned. No, not the one from Narnia, but pretty close. She goes around whipping people. “Kinky”. Yeah yeah yeah. She wants immortality, Jackie Chan gets hurt in a fight and is going to die, the kid goes off to fight the white witch for the immortality drink to save Jackie. He gets pwned. But Jet Li, Sparrow, and the little Monks from a place they were hanging out at came to save the day. In the end, the staff is returned to the Monkey King dude, whom, *gasp* Jet Li was just a clone of. And Jackie gets his immortality drink. Sparrow gets killed (aww D; ) and the kid gets sent back to his own world where he kicks some butt and *gasp* the old Jackie Chan guy lived, and he’s really Jackie Chan from the Imperial China world.
I was annoyed by a few things. The kid was lame. Sparrow seemed pointless, though she was sweet. And the Witch had this theme music..it was like the Ironman theme from the Ironman commercials. Some random guitar stuff. The way it was advertised made no mention of the white kid. And it was incredibly Ironic. When I first saw Chan’s elderly character, I knew he had some relation to the drunkard in the commercials. And the resemblance between Li and the Monkey man immediately tipped me off that they were the same. It was way too predictable.
i did love the music, the atmosphere, the story, and of course, the fighting. Oh, the fights were heavenly. Alone, they were worth the price of admission. The soundtrack was gorgeous. The costumes were amazing. The visual effects were realistic and stunning. It was comical and serious all at once. I highly suggest seeing it whenever you get the chance. You’re sure to enjoy it ;D
Coming soon: Ironman, Speed Racer, and Indy 4
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